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Steve Burchell counsellor psychotherapist

 

Welcome 

This set of web pages are a shop window for my psychotherapy and supervision private practice based in West London near Richmond, Isleworth, Hounslow and Ealing. They are intended to help you decide whether you would like to work with me. Have a look through the site or contact me with any further questions.

If you would like to read a paper I wrote for BACP here is the information sheet G8 Counselling Asylum Seekers and Refugees 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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This site is partly self-constructed using those wonderful people at Chameleon but, due to my tinkering, may not behave as expected. Please let me know if there are any glitches in your browser. For example - do you see the glass as half empty or half full ?

 

 

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Blog

Thoughts about the project of therapy

I've been thinking about the project of therapy

Parents will fail us. Its practically a given and not something to regret. We will fail our children in some way, if we have them - its part of the job, to grow resilience and autonomy. Show me the offspring of parents that perfectly and immediately meet every developmental need and I will show you a hothouse flower that cannot trust themselves to survive outside of that cushioning.

 

And it's not just parents. Friends, teachers, faiths, government, the environment, even our own body. The world will in some way let us down. It's part of being alive in this corporeal form.

That is not to say, however, that the myriad of accidental failings are without cost. They often hurt and provoke the development of primitive defences to mitigate that pain. Primitive, precisely because they are new and unrefined. Some parents fail us so enormously, and repeatedly, sometimes in ways that we can only conclude are deliberately about us, that those defences are similarly catastrophic. These 'schemas' - or the way we relate to others and the world - may temporarily ensure our survival, but usually become our downfall.

We go through the world expecting and re-creating the same scenarios over and over - increasingly hating the results, often blaming others for our suffering. Finally the avoidance of pain that such defences were designed to ensure no longer stack up against the costs in terms of depression, substance abuse, failed relationships and deep sense of discontent with Self. A crisis occurs. That's when we seek therapy.

In therapy we can bring those failed defences - often layered with lifestyle and character, beliefs and values - and enact them again without judgement. Except this time there is the chance to get a different outcome. Through the therapist entering into a genuine but non-collusive relationship we are compassionately confronted with what we do. The holding up of a fiercely loving mirror to our way of relating gives us the chance to try again differently. To examine the pain that we fear so much and see it in the context of the distress that resulted from its avoidance. And to try again - to risk opening that wound to clean and heal it differently.

Not an easy thing. Takes skill and courage. But ultimately more worthwhile than any other project.

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Supervision slots are on Wednesdays or Thursdays during the daytime, in Isleworth (occasional Tuesdays possible in 2017)

 

Therapy slots are Mondays (daytime and evening) and Fridays (daytimes only) in Ealing. There are occasional one-off slots to explore working with me, or a limited set of three or four when on-going clients are away.

 I also keep a small waiting list of people that get first refusal whenever slots become available.

 

Please get in touch to discuss the type of issues you would like to address.

 

See the FAQ here for location

 

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